PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize