so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
It's blow job season.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
