I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Damn victory sex feels great
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
the raccoons are back...
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