Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize