New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
did you just send me my own nude
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
