I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
