Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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