you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
