I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Non-Jews are for practice
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
