laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Randomize
