I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize