I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
