He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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