The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Just pee around me
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
