He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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