we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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