is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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