he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
