my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
