I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize