why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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