Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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