haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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