dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
