You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
