This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
