so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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