I think my fart just growled at me.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Randomize
