I want to walk on stilts...naked
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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