make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
