I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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