We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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