Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
