Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
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