I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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