so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Randomize
