If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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