didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
