Sry I called you an 8
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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