i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
