guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
