Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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