marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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