So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
She announced her abortion via fbk
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
