If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize