): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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