where does the pee come out of this thing
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize
