I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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