We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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