You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
